A List

I was going to write a detailed post about my arrival in Rezekne and the subsequent week of no postings. I decided that was boring. Instead, I shall sum up my week in observations. Forgive me for not having photos yet. I’m used to people near me taking photos of anything interesting and then tagging me on Facebook. I will remedy this. I promise.

Observations in no particular order:

1. Cat ladies are universal.

2. The love of cats overcomes language barriers.

3. Charades and a dictionary also help with language barriers.

4. Latvia has better toilets than Ukraine. No squatties so far!

5. High-school students smell and act similarly no matter the country.

6. There is no polite way to say “piece of shit” and still convey the same sentiment. (A student asked for a polite version.)

7. I can’t use a gas stove very well.

8. My insurance covers the transport of my body if I blow myself up in a gas-stove accident.

9. Skype is an inadequate way to properly convey to my father my fear of blowing myself up with my stove.

10. The substitution of pelmeni in my mom’s tortellini soup is fan-freaking-tastic.

11. There are 16 different kinds of pelmeni in my grocery stove. Heaven.

12. There are 25 different kinds of potted meat.

13. There are 100 different meats in a tube of some sort. 

13a b/c I didn't want to add a number: You shouldn't take my numbers literally. 

14. I am afraid of the meat here.

15. ‘Call Me Maybe’ is everywhere.

16. Clothes are, actually, as expensive as I was warned.

17. My apartment is much less expensive than my old apartment.

18. It doesn’t have a bathroom sink.

19. The glorious old tub makes up for having to brush my teeth in the kitchen.

20. It is good if your Russian-speaking landlord’s wife speaks English.

21. Renumbering this list is a pain so I’ll just add things as they pop into my head rather than insert them topically.

22. Latvians have kick-ass bread.

23. It’s a good thing I walk places because otherwise I would gain a lot of weight while in Latvia.

24. Mushrooms are an art-form here.

25. I wish I had the TARDIS’ ability to translate every language. It would make reading the instructions to the washing machine easier.(Maybe I could steal one....)

26. That’s cheating, though.

27. TARDIS translation would help me interpret the shelves full of flavored mayonnaise in my grocery store.

28. There are also 600 kinds of fish-product.

29. I walk around Maxima (the grocery store) with my English-Latvian phrase book.

30. Jellied meat is “galerts” according to my book.

31. “Es nesaprotu” means “I don’t understand.”

32. “Tev ir tik skaistas acis” means “You have beautiful eyes.”

33. “Novac rokas” means “Take off your hands!”

34. My guidebook also tells me how to say “Only if we use a condom.”

35. Google translate that. I’m tired of copying from the book.

36. Google Translate is a wonderful and wonderfully flawed thing.

39. Every time I see a cat, I remember the time I was in L’viv when I picked up a cat and some lady told me it was diseased only after I spent fifteen minutes cuddling it.

40. Its appropriate that we’ve come full circles to cats.   

41. I miss this girl:

42. I also miss my parents, but I don't have a photo of them sitting in a window looking pensive. 

43. They should remedy that. 

44. I'm not going to proofread this list. I'm a rebel. 

45. This post is brought to you by M.I.A. "Bad Girls."

46. I don't remember if I've linked that song before. 

47. Whatever. Listen to it again. 

48. I'm not a bad girl. At all. 

49. I can't even jay walk without getting nervous. 

50. I'm going to read some and then sleep.